It’s been awhile since I last wrote … Well this will be a short one :) after days of struggle I’ve made a point to live on … Well I’ve heard the rumors that my secret has been spread .. Yes I love her once I’ve confess ? Erm so ? Do you have to question her for that ? I guess not cause It ain’t your business ? And why do you care so much ? Perhaps you love her ? Well confess to her than maybe she might have feelings for you ? And yes I’m smoking and I’m having lots and lots of cigarettes everyday ! Because I just know that she hates people who smoke and she’ll be disappointed .. And yes I did it because I knew she will not love me and for me to move on I need her to feel this way so I could do what I should do .. I’ve never wanted her to stop caring but all this isn’t helping me to walk away it just made me stay and made me hold on to hope .. But I’ve never believed in hope so why am I holding it ??? I don’t get it at all she makes me confuse all the time .. I’ve been thinking of her every day and I wish she would just say I’ll hold on to you because I’ve started loving you .. And I guess after she says this I’ll stop being a disappointment to her .. 안녕!